A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, I'm not feeling well. I think I might be a dog."
The doctor looks at him puzzled and says, "I'm sorry, what do you mean you think you're a dog?"
The man replies, "Well, every time someone rings the doorbell, I go crazy and start barking. And when I see a squirrel outside, I can't help but chase after it. I even tried to lick my own elbow the other day!"
The doctor chuckles and says, "I see what you mean. But don't worry, I think I can help you with this. Just lay down on the couch and I'll take a look."
So the man lays down on the couch and the doctor starts examining him. After a few minutes, the doctor looks up and says, "I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is, you're not actually a dog. The bad news is, you're just plain crazy."
The man sighs in relief and says, "Well, that's a relief. I was starting to get worried there for a minute. So what should I do now, doc?"
The doctor replies, "Well, I recommend you start seeing a therapist and maybe take some medication to help with your delusions. And in the meantime, try to avoid any dog parks or fire hydrants. And definitely stop trying to lick your own elbow."