A man walks into a bar with a monkey on his shoulder. The bartender looks at the man and says, "Hey, why do you have a monkey on your shoulder?"
The man replies, "Oh, he's my pet monkey. He's really smart and can do all sorts of tricks!"
Intrigued, the bartender asks, "Really? What kind of tricks can he do?"
The man says, "Watch this!" and sets the monkey on the bar. The monkey immediately starts juggling a few lemons, catching them with his little paws and tossing them in the air. The bartender is amazed and claps in applause.
Impressed, the bartender asks, "That's amazing! What else can he do?"
The man grins and says, "Well, he can also play the piano!" He points to a piano in the corner of the bar and the monkey scampers over to it. He starts playing a beautiful Beethoven sonata flawlessly, making everyone in the bar stop and stare in amazement.
The bartender is astounded and exclaims, "That's incredible! You should take that monkey on the road and make some money off of his talent!"
The man nods and says, "I would, but he's a terrible driver."
(Disclaimer: Please remember, it's just a joke! No monkeys were harmed in the making of this story)